I used to be mesmerised by a song I used to play when I was a kid. I used to play it when ever I felt the need to be emo - breakups, bouts of semi-depression, insomnia, when Everton lost. To me, at least, it was the most inspiring, heartwrenching and grand piece of music I had ever laid my ears upon. It had been the longest time since I last heard it.

I felt a tinge of nostalgia coming on tonight, and with all that had been happening recently, I felt a need to channel all that emotion somewhere. I lit a cigarette, put on the track and sat on my carpet. I could feel the majestic piano score flood my senses once again. And I felt a flood of memories streaming back to my mind...

***

The Last Song - X Japan

Watching the stars till they're gone
Like an actor all alone
Who never knew the story he was in
Who never knew the story ends
Like the sky reflecting my heart
All the morning begins
I'll read last line

終わらない雨　抱きしめた　
夜が朝を向かえる心はまだ
濡れたまま

In endless rain I've been walking
Like a poet feeling pain
Trying to find the answers
Trying to hide the tears
But it was just a circle that never ends
When the rain stops,I'll turn the page
The page of the first chapter

傷つくだけ　傷ついて　
解ったはずの答えをどうしてまだ　
問いかけてる

Am I wrong to be hurt
Am I wrong to feel pain
Am I wrong to be in the rain
Am I wrong to wish the night won't end
Am I wrong to cry

But I know,
It's not wrong to sing the last song
Cause forever fades

気がつけば　又独り夜の空を　
見つめてる少しづつ消えて行く
Our Memories...

傷つくだけ　傷ついて　
解ったはずの答えをどうしてまだ　
問いかけてる

(I see red)
(I see blue)

(But the silverlining gradually takes over)
When the morning begins
I'll be in the next chapter

終わらない雨　抱きしめた　
夜が朝を向かえる心はまだ
濡れたまま傷つくだけ　傷ついて　
解ったはずの答えをどうしてまだ　
問いかけてる

***

11 minutes of grandeur. I always felt that masterpieces were meant to last longer. I had always been amazed by how Hide played and Yoshiki wrote. How those lines were spoken with a rough sort of melancholy. With solemn sorrow. The title was apt. The last track of the last leg of an erratic era for the band. I practically grew up with this. I missed it.

Just then my eyes started to blur. And I started to breathe with a slight heave just as it softly drifted off the interlude...

And I played it again.